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Ella Mariano

Wear your pride on your sleeve


Article by Ella Mariano Graphics by Alissa Coden

June 28, 2022

 

Growing up in Tonsuya, I’ve been surrounded by LGBTQ+ representation in the neighborhood. They’ve always been in my life, although I never thought about it too much. Some people see them as just their genders, someone different. I see them as people who are the most expressive, creative, caring, and most of all, marvelous.


The neighborhood hairdresser first comes to mind. They’ll know who you’re talking about when you ask for him. 𝙏𝙤𝙩𝙞𝙚 is an owner of a home salon located just behind our house. When we were still kids, my mom would bring us to his home to get our hair cut. And I remember going to his place. It’s not much, but he has this full mirror with pictures of editorial hairstyles plastered over the walls, with soap operas playing on a small box TV. Whenever we get our hair cut, people would come and go to talk to him, either to keep up with the latest chika, borrow something, or even bring food over. Everyone knows him, and I think he’s one of the essential people in our neighborhood. Whenever he cuts my hair, I know that he’s the reason why I get more confident about how I look. He knows what style would suit me best. And when I tell him what I want to get, he’ll deliver. He even did my sister and I’s hair and make-up for graduations and proms. He's practically everyone's hair and make-up artist in town. He was part of my childhood. Going to another salon to get my hair done is not the same as calling him and knowing that he’ll do precisely what you want. He had lived a good life, and he’ll be a part of ours for the rest of our lives.


I also remembered the maid next door. I cannot remember his name, but my mom calls him “𝙏𝙝𝙚 𝘽𝙖𝙝𝙖𝙢𝙖𝙨”. He’s an openly gay maid. Growing up, all I knew were women maids because they were who my parents and my relatives would hire. This was the first time they hired someone new, and I thought that was cool. I think he became the talk of the town when he stepped foot at the Mendiola Compound. Whenever he’s around, everyone feels more lively. There were no dull moments at all. I was intimidated by this booming personality compared to my reserved nature. I would observe him while he talked to the other maids in the compound and thought about what it would be like to be as confident as him. He was so entertaining to be around that I remembered when we were all stranded in our homes during Typhoon Ondoy. All we could do was talk to each other through our 2nd-floor windows and have makeshift ziplines to give supplies to each other. It was a very depressing time, but it's as if the sky cleared out when he suddenly climbed up to the roof and started doing catwalks and mini-performances for us. He would model as if he were in Miss Universe and suddenly shout, “Welcome to the Bahamas!” The once silent compound was filled with laughter and applause. You rarely see that during a state of calamity, but I guess we’re the lucky ones.


At an early age, I knew them as people who would take their time to take care of others before themselves. And I admire Totie and the Bahamas. It’s too late to thank them because that was years ago. But if they can read this right now, I want to say that they were a part of my youth. They were a part of who I became right now for merely observing them from afar. They inspired me to be unapologetically myself.


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