Tissue

Illustration by Gwynelle Tovera

DISCLAIMER: The topic of this story is about suicide. All jokes or satirical actions made by characters within the story are bound to subjection and must not be taken at face value. The story is made with no intention of mocking the dark topic of suicide, but rather focus on the brighter side of human life by finding value, purpose, and meaning within it.

CHAPTER 1: ISSUES AND REASONS

Festive nights were nearing Lightcrown once again, and for the commonfolk who prepared for the upcoming festivities, smooth deals and trade are the first things that their minds will pry upon if they wish to market their fresh produce. Each race was no different in seeking the tradition of it either, even as the grand market would only last for 7 days, a common ground for change and relationships built to last were all they ever hoped for. However, even with busy streets that drowned voices of laughter and trade, a locked shop within the street corner had hushed the noisy crowd. A loud scream of a woman who sounded angrier than concerned stopped all of their tongues from spewing another word. While many peered above the shop who sold rolls of razor-thin papers used for daily activities, they would later forget and glance the other way a second later. It was because of many unfound rumors about its owner shouting at a daily occurrence was none of their business, or simply there are more things important than seeing what is going on. Not that any were ignorant of it either, it was simply that none of them truly knew what any of it meant, as all, they only hoped it doesn’t become something handled obligatorily, or simply a minor issue. But within the confines of the shop, two individuals argued back and forth about something.

“What are you doing?!” shouted the woman.

“Well, what do you think I’m doing?” The man replied while fixing a wrap around his neck.

“Seriously? Look I know you can’t do a lot of things right Robin, but this is ridiculous!”

“That’s why I’m doing this Irma!”

“So you’re going to hang yourself?! With Tissue?!”

“Well, I can’t find anything strong enough to—Ack!”

Suddenly, Robin slipped over the stool he stood, ripping the rolls of paper he attached to the ceiling. The scattered sheets and knots all plummeted on the ground, while Irma watched Robin bury his head in disappointment.

“I have no comment on that one.” Irma sighed.

“And seriously, what are you thinking?!”

“I’m worthless!” Robin cried.

“I think those tissues you wasted would beg to differ and would like to have a word with you.”

“Why the hell did you stop me?”

“Well, that ain’t me for sure. Blame your lubricated foot you mistook for glue.”

Frustrated, Robin kicked the stool in an attempt to break out his anger. Instead, he would slip once again and fall onto the clustered floor.

“Are you done making a clown out of yourself?” Irma sneered.

“You’re not helping Irma,” Robin replied.

“Well, neither are you. I mean, look at all the tissue rolls you’ve wasted, not one of them is even complaining about what you did to them.”

With a deep sigh and a sniffle to release, Robin buried his head further into the ground pathetically. Irma however mused at the situation for a short while, but it didn’t take long for her patience to worn out silently.

“You have something to talk about?” Irma said.

“I have no idea…” Robin whined.

“Ugh, with the festival nearing… surely your tiny nugget in your head can at least display something for the world to see right?”

“No… I’m afraid not…”

“U-huh, and tell me why again?”

“Because of people’s pity?”

Out of frustration, Irma shoved a crumpled piece of tissue and shoved it in Robin’s mouth.

“Ack-! What was that for?!” Robin said.

“Just letting the tissue do its thing: Wiping the shit coming out of your mouth.”

“That was nasty tasting…”

“Gee, I wonder why, shit never ever tasted good no?”

“It’s not funny Irma!”

“Well, it is for me, and why are you going with that when you just attempted suicide hmm? You really think it’s funny just to leave me alone just like that?”

“Well… I-I didn’t think of it that way…”

“You never did, unfortunately.”

Robin remained on the floor silent, without any words nor fuss from the comment Irma made about him. It was perhaps that those very words she said suddenly pulled the stops in his belief, shaking the grounds of what he considered a solution became a despicable answer truly something beyond the scope of reasoning. The twists and turns of reason within his own sense of what was justified came crashing down within an instant when he looked at her stern eyes.

The guilt of what he once cast away now overwhelmed his thoughts, a sense of dread that he did in fact had something to lose. One look away, and there she was, Robin refused to face her angered eyes filled with a sad tone he could not understand. It was a perfect façade hiding the straightforward answer he wished to know, but before he could ask why, Irma suddenly sat on his back.

“Leaving me behind all like that, can you imagine that hmm?” Irma said.

“Irma, please… I can’t breathe…” Robin replied gasping for air.

“Oh? What’s the sudden turn? Weren’t you trying to kill yourself a while ago? Suddenly concerned? Or perhaps… your tiny nugget finally understands the value of life?”

“Please… I can’t…”

“Here’s the thing, tell me why you did that to yourself. Answer me that and I’ll stand up.”

“Life is just cruel…”

“Oh, how edgy. Another answer would be nice Robin.”

“I… don’t know.”

“Tch, of course, you don’t. Unless you don’t spew shitty excuses, you won’t find an answer. Come on, I’ll wait.”

Robin gasped desperately for air as he pondered her cutting words, thinking deeply if there was an answer to her question. His eyes looked around for anything that could give a hint or ease his pain. Everything on his left and right was nothing more than the tissue rolls he wasted, all slipping against his fingers. Helplessly, he tried to push Irma upwards to shrug her off, but she added weight to herself the more he resisted. Meanwhile, Irma rubbed her forehead in discontent, knowing well that Robin never bothered trying to answer her question back.

“I’m waiting for your little nugget to process an answer, Robin,” Irma said.

“Please… Irma, I can’t—"

“I’m waiting.”

Without any option left, Robin tried to reach out a box in front of him, nudging it by bits with his fingers. Slowly, the box reached the edge, and out fell a mirror that reflected his face. Within an instant, he felt numb distress that made him weak, the sudden reflection of his struggle within the mirror created a disillusioned imagery of himself, angered and weakened as it stared back.

The face he saw within the mirror was shattered, full of undetermined grit that he could not understand. It was there when he realized that within the glass wall of another plane of existence, was someone who had been torn, and yet there was still a speck of will that wished to live on. A forgotten and wasted art of something he thought beautiful were right in front of him, and all that was left is to accept what lied beyond.

“I always complain, don’t I…?” Robin said.

“There we go! Simple answer right?” Irma replied before standing up. “Difficult to accept, isn’t it? Remember there’s always a part of you that’s at fault.”

“But what if it’s not beyond my control…?”

“Really? Are you complaining again? Do you want me to shove another in your mouth?”

“No! No, no. Just asking if you’ve had one instance that’s… just beyond your control.”

“Ah, that I have.”

“R-Really?”

“Let me guess, you wanna know what I did then?”

“Y-Yes.”

“Well, fair enough. But before that, let me take you and your little nugget out on a walk first. Come with me.”

When Robin nodded, Irma scooped up another roll of tissue that laid on the floor before going outside of the door. However, a sudden burst of recollection and realization came by in her mind, in that she felt that Robin’s actions were something reminiscent of something within her past. Buried within her mind she saw what she could have been if she had already given up. But then again, stopping Robin at his attempt of claiming his own life was a decision someone did for her long ago, and it was only but necessary to return the favor to someone else. Even then, she would have still chosen to save Robin, and land him in the right direction. “There is no perfect story in this world, only experience and hardship do we truly find our own worth,” She thought as she smiled at a distant image in her mind to the very person who told her those very words before.

But a small unintentional laugh came by from her mouth as she relived on those memories.

Robin stepped out of the room confused, as Irma turned her gaze back with a hindered smile. A giddy voice thus led him downstairs, where he laid eyes to a sarcastic voice that urged him to now create a new life for himself, and it will only begin if he understands what comes next. From an ideology where crossroads meet, and where life took toll of one’s own image without mercy, Irma turned one last time to see the disheartened Robin shaking behind her, uttering the words she always thought to share where time arises.

“Now, let’s visit a little shop, they need a stock of the very thing you wasted,” Irma said.

“W-What?” Robin replied.

“An old geezer there needs some of our stock. Better best hurry, the festivities be starting soon.”

“Can’t you do it alone…?”

“Well according to my big nugget, I can, unfortunately, I have less than three arms.”

“Oh right.”

“And as for your little nugget, I do think an old geezer can put it to good use too. Let’s go.”

“An old what now?”

“You’ve been livin’ in my household and still hasn’t picked up my language?”

“H-Hey! It’s not like I can understand every single slang you put up! And this is the first time I’ve heard of it…”

“Yeah, whatever. Come on.”

The two raced downstairs, with Robin trailing behind Irma, he rushed not in excitement but in fear of being left behind. It was there when he realized that there was unhidden motivation within him that kept his feet from going through the unknown and that the sound of muffled voices from the outside grew louder when he followed Irma further. When light passed through the door that led to the outside streets, his heart pounded when Irma stood before it and stopped.

“Let’s go see some sunlight shall we?” Irma said.